So…as you know, I recently decided to give this whole ‘online dating’ thing a try. And I don’t mean the brainless swipe left, swipe right dating that I’ve done in the past. I decided a few months ago that I was going to give it a real try.
And I did — Here’s what happened…
I met someone.
Someone who I felt was kind, good-hearted, and dorky like me. And very handsome.
What struck me most, was that he didn’t approach me like all the other bimbos on Bumble. He was a gentleman. I had gotten so used to the cheesy pickup lines and booty-calls — let’s call it what it is — that when I received his simple invite to go salsa dancing, after a couple of weeks of talking, I was hopeful. And needless to say, I was excited! So much so that I did the one thing I hate the most, I went shopping for a first date outfit.
I won’t bore you with every detail, just know that I genuinely enjoyed the conversation we had and was looking forward to meeting him.
Then life happened…and the date didn’t. I was disappointed, but I understood why.
I had been ghosted. There’s more to this story that I’m not going to share — we actually ended up meeting totally by accident and ‘talked’ again briefly, but long story short, he wasn’t interested.
I can be vulnerable with you guys, right? I’d be lying if I said this didn’t bother me.
Because it did. As much as I tried to fight it, I found myself questioning what was it about me that wasn’t worth the pursuit?
Was it because I was a good person? Was it because I am grounded in my faith? Was it because he knew I had standards, and wouldn’t be another fast swipe or Netflix and chill.
Then I realized…he just wasn’t that into me, and it’s okay.
Because I deserve more, and I deserve better. I deserve to be pursued and cherished by someone who wants to get to know me. Someone who will ask me about my day, encourage and support me in times of stress or struggle. I deserve someone who would take the time simply to say hi.
I share this because you deserve all of those things too. You deserve someone who will love and cherish you! Someone who will pursue you, get to know you, and will bend over backward just to see you smile.
Yes, it sucks, but it has all been a learning lesson for me. I learned what I have to look forward to in a relationship, and what I refuse to accept. I have no hard feelings. I still believe that he is a very nice person…the time just wasn’t right.
Until it is, I’ll keep my head up high and carry on. And who knows, maybe I’ll meet ‘Mr. Right’ someday soon…